Sometimes people we care about can say things that hurt us. A lot.
I believe that the way people treat us are a reflection of how we treat ourselves. Clearly, I have some work to do in this area. But that takes time. I was looking for a more immediate solution and I found something that resonated with me in Be Gentle, Be Love by Amanda Oaks*. Here it is in short:
1) Write down everything that you’d like to say to ‘them’. Don’t hold anything back.
2) Paint over it with love. Pour love all over it.
I got so excited about painting that I nearly skipped the first part of the exercise. But I thought I’d do it properly (I told my newsletter subscribers that I would), so I set out to write everything I had to say. Of course, the pain came back. I was a bit worried that I wouldn’t fit everything onto the page, but I ended up with just enough space.
Then came the painting (I blurred it a bit to make sure my angry writing is not legible).
This art project didn’t solve the problem but it took the edge off, so that I could go to bed and sleep instead of wanting to cry all night.
It made me more open to looking at alternative ways of approaching the situation.
Later I thought how similar this experience was to some guided mediations I’ve done, where you imagine the problem then shine the light onto it, or surround it with a bubble of love. Only for me it was a more real experience. I could see it, I could touch it (and get my hands dirty), it was there. My kind of meditation.